what am I if I dont draw

I have been drawing since I was at least 5. I love drawing, I love art, I love making things. so what am I if not an artist. what am I if not simply what I draw. I fear so much that I will never get better than what I already have. that I will never be as good as people around me. and yeah, I know that comparing myself to adults that have more time than I could ever is not realistic but what about the people younger than me? what about these fuck ass kids (with the love to them) that can draw, color, and pose so much better than I ever could. holy fuck I might as well never pick up a pencil again.

I can't pose, I can color, I cant draw side profiles, I'm pretty sure I got bad same face syndrome, my hands are okay but I can only draw them one way, I can just barely draw arms in a at minimum pleasurable way. I can't draw feet, hell I'm not even good at legs, and I'm no good at drawing female anatomy. Every time I draw, it's the same thing. a bust drawing of some guy standing there. if I'm lucky it's a half body, and if i'm even luckier he might have something in his hand, or maybe on his hip, or his chest, or just in the air for some reason. and it's been like that for what? years now? years. oh my God! this is it for me! this is as good as I'm gonna get and I will never ever be even close to as great as the people I look up to.

huzzah.